Today's Wx: Cloudy with a chance of OH #*&^!
Me: zzzzzzzzz
Inconspicuous Grey Car: OH MY GOD
Me: O.O
Inconspicuous Grey Car: GET DOWN HERE AND LOOK AT THIS
Me: Dude. It's just a few dimples.
Inconspicuous Grey Car: A few. A FEW. I LOOK LIKE A GOLF BALL
Me: Okay, so it's more than a few. Stop yelling.
Inconspicuous Grey Car: This is awful. I am never going outside again.
Me: Car ...
Inconspicuous Grey Car: It's your fault, you know. Not even out of the house for five minutes and a thunderstorm finds you. That shit was the size of quarters. QUARTERS
Me: I can't help that.
Inconspicuous Grey Car: I can't go anywhere looking like this. I'm going to get laughed at.
Me: No you won't. Those aren't dents, they're scars.
Inconspicuous Grey Car: ...
Me: People will see you and think "Now that is a car that has SEEN SOME SHIT."
Inconspicuous Grey Car: They will?
Me: Yup. No one will fuck with you. They will see your scars, and they will walk on home. Do you see people fucking with Danny Trejo?
Inconspicuous Grey Car: Well ... no.
Me: That's because they see his scars and they know it would end badly if they did.
Inconspicuous Grey Car: So I'm a badass now?
Me: The baddest.
Inconspicuous Grey Car: I can live with that.
Posted 4 months ago
2 notes
  1. anderrhea posted this